There is no college course for matchmaking, dating or relationships. There is no magic recipe book that if followed exactly will find your perfect mate. There aren’t even many dating experts in Ireland to point the way, like other industries. In fact, my book Go Get Him is the first Irish dating book written by a woman, and the first dating book published by an established Irish publisher. If I’m honest, I never saw myself as an author. I can’t even say I enjoyed the writing experience all that much. I’m a talker, a move-shaker, a girl who struggles with discipline. However, this book with its clear message of giving women the best possible chance to get out there and take control of their dating lives, just had to be written.
I arrived back in Ireland four years ago with a plan to become a dating expert. People looked at me like I was crazy – why would I want to put myself out there like that, and why I couldn’t just get a normal job? But I had dream and was prepared to do everything that I could to immerse myself in – living, eating and breathing – the dating industry in order to be the first and best dating expert Ireland had ever seen. For me, the book was about going full circle and in essence is all I’ve learned over the last four years, through the books I’ve read, my beliefs on what works and what doesn’t work, my client work, and of course my own dating journey.
A PR girl at heart, I managed one of the best PR campaigns ever in Ireland ’40 dates in 40 days’ generating media value of over €250,000 – I went on a date a day for 40 days in a row. This was the first dating expedition of its kind and the resulting blog received international exposure and numerous media appearances both in Ireland and UK. But the expedition wasn’t just about a clever PR gimmick even though it certainly did launch my business, it was about showing everyone that dating in Ireland had changed and that we needed to step up and talk about it. I also wanted to show people that I was willing to practice what I preached and the OTM strategy, one of the core principles in the book, was born from this 40 day expedition, showing singles all the diverse ways to create opportunities to meet new people. Now, I’m not telling anyone to try this extreme dating project, in fact, it comes with a ‘don’t try this at home’ mark, however 40 dates did challenge so many commonly destructive limiting beliefs at once, and now, whenever anyone tells me there are no men left, I can simply say there are, and I got 40 of them in row.
There is a notion that writing a book is one of the most glamorous activities going, however I can easily say that this book took all of me to write. Numerous emails to my editor Kristen Jensen and publishers Gill and MacMillan with serious cries of help were sent. Many times too, I got stuck, lost confidence in my knowledge or writing skills, and sometimes just didn’t feel like talking about dating.
However, my cries were usually met with equally strong messages. “Avril, tape yourself and dictate. You just need to extract all the information out of you.”; “Do what you do best. Tell us what you would say if a client came to you in a coaching session.” These direct yet wise pieces of advice kept me going, and one of the key selling points of Go Get Him as my straight talking, funny, positive, but brutally honest voice that can be heard throughout.
The thing is, I get that dating can be overwhelming sometimes. I’ve been there and have to continually keep myself in check. I get that there are so many women who would do anything for the ‘perfect relationship’. I get that there are a whole load of dickhead guys out there and I get that dating can sometimes feel like you have just come off a battlefield. That is why I knew my book needed to be different. Forget about the tips and techniques. I needed to write a book that centered around working on the essential elements of a high value woman so women will make better choices and won’t except the dating ‘shite’ that’s out there, or even worse still, stay stuck in a dead end dating game.
I’ve worked with hundreds of clients at this stage and many of their case studies are mentioned in the book. Many women travel hours to see me thinking that I have some sort of stigmata on my hands that I can cure them of their dating woes. Too many women are sitting around waiting to be chosen, to be fixed or even, heaven above, to be saved. However, nobody can save you and especially no man can save you. Go Get Him gives you that kick in the arse that you need with the clear message that you are responsible for your own dating life and only you have the power to move your dating life forward and be the Flame that you are.
I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling. Right now, mine is to cut the bullshit and find a way to offer my service and share my message with as many people as possible, and there lies my book Go Get Him!
Here’s to more adventures and here’s to more callings, and hopefully more books.
Enjoy it all.
(c) Avril Mulcahy
About Go Get Him!
CALLING ALL THE SINGLE LADIES … GET READY TO GO DATING!
Do you keep thinking that Prince Charming will knock on your door, only to be met by the pizza delivery man? Is your idea of an action-packed evening a night on the couch watching rom-coms with a tub of ice cream? Have you given up on love or are you stuck in a dating rut? It’s time to change the record!
Using a no-nonsense approach, dating expert Avril Mulcahy teaches you how to break the bad habits and negative attitudes holding you back from finding Mr Right. You’ll learn how to:
- Stop faffing and start dating
- Ditch the dickheads
- Create a killer online profile
- Increase your opportunities to meet men
- Overcome your limiting beliefs and ooze confidence
- Attract and keep the man of your dreams.
Straight-talking, funny, a bit bold but brutally honest, GO GET HIM! will give you the push you need to take control of your life, get off the couch and start dating using a three-stage strategy:
- Get Ready – Get to know your needs and what you’re looking for in a man
- Get Set – Learn the practical details of perfect dating
- Go! – Become a goddess and put your dating plans into action.
So what are you waiting for? Get this book and GO GET HIM!
Go Get Him! is in bookshops now or pick up your copy online here (what’s stopping you?!)
Avril Mulcahy is Ireland’s premier modern matchmaker, blending traditional matchmaking with modern day technology, psychology and know-how. Formerly a public relations guru with a BComm and MA in Public Relations and a licensed NLP coach, Avril is now one of Ireland’s leading authorities on dating and relationships and helps singles across Ireland and the world find dating success and love. With a tough-love attitude, an eye for chemistry and a passion for fun, Avril has a proven track record of helping hundreds of singles find their perfect match. Her matchmaking journey began 10 years ago when she started organising singles events in Australia and Ireland. She now runs a successful boutique matchmaking agency, catering for top CEOs, successful entrepreneurs, farmers, nurses, teachers and lawyers. She writes regularly in several national newspapers and magazines about dating and ‘singlelista’ life, including Now, Stellar, The Evening Herald and RSVP, and has featured on TV and radio shows in Ireland and abroad including ITV’s ‘This Morning’, RTE’s ‘Saturday Night Show’, Today FM and Newstalk.