I have always loved to write. From the moment I could read, my pocket money all went on books. I loved to tell stories to my siblings right out of my imagination especially at night before we would go to sleep.
Later I would write short stories, songs and poems. I would keep them locked away all in a box in the attic. Never really sharing with anyone else for fear they were never really good enough. One day I was talking to a friend of mine who got me to consider continuing to write and not be afraid instead to turn that fear into adventure.
Write because you love it, if nothing else your friends and family will appreciate what you have to say. So there you go that’s what I decided to do.
I’ve always had a passion for stationary and I still do. I love the smell of books & browsing in book stores for hours. I love the feel of crisp clear blank paper waiting for a pencil or pen to begin a life long commitment to each other.
Today, I also use my Google or Word doc and I try to keep on hand a small book and pencil with me at all times in my bag, for any inspiration I may find on my travels every day in my ordinary life.
Writing to me isn’t something you need to discover its part of who you are, but the real discovery to me is in the way we use the gift of writing.
Learning from one another and sharing our experiences has been a real encouragement to me and I am happy to be a member of this website
BOYS WILL BE BOYS
Two young boys aged Seven years both living next door to each other one was called Miles the other boy was called Jack.
Both boys had been close friends ever since they were able to walk.
Usually, during school term they would love to play outside with each other especially kicking around their football.
One day as the rain poured down and the winds outside pummelled against the two houses, both boys had previously made an arrangement to play football outside. Unaware, of just how bad the weather was Miles approached his mother whilst she was deep in thought washing the dishes up from breakfast.
He called on her gently “Mum” … Can I play outside with my ball?”
He sensed his mother’s distraction, so he increased his volume and insistence
“MUM” he said louder,
His mother replied from deep in thought ….
“CAN I play outside? “
She stared out the window, and without even looking at her son, she gave him a reply
“No Miles! Can’t you see it’s lashing with rain?”
“But I WANT TO PLAY WITH JACK”
his voice was adamant but tearful.
“ Don’t be silly” his mother rebuked, “Jack won’t be out in this weather”
Not satisfied with her brush off he continued in a whining tone.
“But why not, I can put on my rain coat & my new wellies PLEASEEEEE”
Miles resorted to more bargaining power, hoping that his mother was so distracted she would just give in as usual. He was in no way prepared for her determined reply.
“NO! Miles …. I’ve already TOLD YOU already its raining so don’t keep asking… go and find something to do you’ve got tons of toys to play with”
Miles totally ignored the alternative suggestion…. his NOW determined voice carried a disrespectful tone …
“But why can’t I ? Your just being mean”
His mother’s voice challenged him back
“Because …I SAID SO ..it’s raining”
She could feel the tense atmosphere building, and was not equipped today emotionally to handle the difficulties of a strong willed seven yr old.
Her voice weakened and a pleading tone had now replaced the irritation she had felt earlier. Her emotional energy so early on in the day was already depleting.
“Miles please, why don’t you just go and find something else to do, I know why don’t you go & play one of your games on your Xbox?”
Miles snaps back at his Mother, “But I don’t want to go on my Xbox”
Through gritted teeth his whole demeanor was now ready to challenge his mother. His focus had shifted to the point where he wants to wear her down so that she will cave in to his request. It’s strange to witness just how quickly he has already sensed his mother’s weakened boundaries and he is confident if he continues to push her she will give in to him & give him what he wants as usual.
Sensing the right moment was now he intensifies his voice with a more demanding fervour he tells his mother
“I don’t care what you say, I’m going outside anyway”
He makes his way to the back door without looking back and fumbles on the handle to open the door that is locked.
Suddenly without any further reasoning Miles’s mother pinches up her face and grasping him firmly by the arm frog marches him to the foot of the stairs to send it up to his room for time out.
Miles feeling defeated began screaming at the top of his voice, and stiffening his whole body and making it very difficult for his mum to keep a hold of him.
He began to go into one of his temper tantrums kicking and screaming,
” I hate you, I hate you” He continued to lash out and kick.
He kept repeating himself through the anger and sobbing tears. She held back with every ounce of her fibre from smacking him, but nothing prepared her for the raging anger that roared inside of her, it took them both by complete surprise.
Through the stinging tears she screamed at him and ordered him to go to his room for time out!
“But why” he sobbed, “I haven’t done anything wrong”
His mother completely and utterly exhausted ordered him “Miles …GO NOW”
Miles still breaking his heart crying, thundered up the stairs feeling more frustrated and angrier than ever before at his mother. She heard him bang his room door shut, and there he lay on the bed & sobbed.
Miles mother collapsed on the bottom step, the feelings of deep disappointment was washing over her like the torrential rain outside.
Ashamed now of her own lack of self control, it took all she had to quieten the urge to run after Miles, and tell him how sorry she was for losing control. But the stifled tears had already blurred her vision, she now fell in a heap on the floor sobbing uncontrollably.
Outside the winds continued howling, the torrential rain pounded against the windows. Mile’s mother felt the stormy atmosphere outside had also penetrated into her very home.
What on earth had just happened!! She tried to retrace the earlier moments to figure out where it all went wrong. Earlier that morning she had received a bank statement.
After reading it the harsh reality of their happier days earlier that month of their spending spree was now taking its toll.
Had she REALLY spent so much money?
She had really gone overboard treating both Miles and herself quite often during the previous month. She felt the heavy responsibility of keeping a good home, good wholesome meals on the table the many expensive clothes and gifts and sportswear Miles both needed and often wanted.
She herself also had contributed to the ever increasing debt with her own heavy expenses in all avenues to maintain her high standard of living.
Now she realised it had certainly made a deeper hole in the family budget than she anticipated. How was she going to explain this to Mile’s dad Tom later that evening?
She recalled in her mind his previous anxious pleadings with her to be careful, and rightly so as in the last few months his work was not as consistent as in earlier years.
She had verbally complied with him of course, but the realisation now dawned on her she had only been half hearted about complying with his request.
He had been overcome by the feelings of desperation of their financial situation. In turn this only heightened the sense of her own loss of control, and that in turn propelled her forward to mindlessly over spend the insane amounts of money on her ever impulsive spending sprees.
Mile’s sobs had now subsided to a lower and more tired moan. She felt a deep heaviness in her heart felt as the waves of guilt began to stab her deep down inside. The critical inner voice now awakened by this tense and shattered moment began to berate her.
You’re a useless mother how could you be so cruel? You can’t even keep your word to your own husband. The debts now will make life much more difficult for them all.
Even if that could possibly be endured seeing the pain and disappointment in Tom’s eyes along with the scolding of a worried husband.
She silently admitted it to herself that the temporary heightened happiness of her momentary spending, was now crudely replaced by the persistent, lingering feelings of shame that now gnawed away deep within her.
I can’t do anything right the critical voice continued to scold her.