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All For Free Speech as Long as it’s Spelt Proper by Brigid O’Connor

Writing.ie | Magazine | News for Writers | The Big Idea

Could people like stop mis-using the English language and use like grammar and stuff and form a complete sentence and maybe end it with a full stop instead of a question?

Unless they’re actually, like, from California?

And could people possibly stop ‘loving’ everything and like also could everyone stop ‘ticking boxes’ because there really cannot be that many boxes left in the universe to be ticking.

Also, could people keep their own regional accents instead of sounding like really bad extras in American teen movies.

Could we please also get over the vampire movie stuff because really we all looked like that in the 1980s and it wasn’t like cool then to be so pale. It was just lack of sunshine and vitamins and we didn’t get outdoors much as vinyl record players weren’t that portable so we had to sit in darkened rooms and sigh a lot.

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And could we please get over the abbreviation culture especially if we are in our forties, like OMG BFF etc.

And a radical thought for the day – maybe we could start writing letters to people instead of texting, ‘TX 4 pressie, luving it, cul8r, luv bff’ especially if it’s to your granny who is 90, she’ll just think her eyesight is gone along with everything else.

Could we please stop like using words and phrases such as ‘random’ and ‘totally’ and ‘awesome’ and stop prefixing everything with the word ‘super’ and using construction industry  words such as ‘nailed it’,  because they are getting a bit worn out.

And could we please keep admiring people like Stephen Fry who would definitely know how to thank his granny for a pullover.

By the way, Stephen Fry, if you somehow managed to read this, I bid you good day, Sir !! and I’m like super excited and  OMG so honoured and loving the fact that you’ve visited and you’re awesome and totally my BFF now.

Random !!

(c) Brigid O’Connor

Brigid O’Connor writes short stories, flash fiction and the occasional poem.   She has written two film screenplays and is currently writing her first novel  -’Elevation’, a contemporary bittersweet family drama set in Dublin.

Her work has been short-listed for the Francis MacManus Short Story Competition, the RTE Guide /Penguin Short Story Competition, included in the New Irish Writing Page in The Irish Independent and a finalist in the Novelicious UK’s First Chapter Competition.  She was a runner up in the DRB Flash Fiction competition .

Her work has been broadcast on radio and included in anthologies such as ‘The Quiet Quarter’, ’50 stories for Pakistan’, ‘New Planet Cabaret’ edited by Dave Lordan and a Boyne Berries issue.

She was selected as a contributor to the Junior Cert Curriculum ‘Personal Writing Section’.

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